The Adventures of Bloggard

Been Around the Block. Got Some Stories. These are Them.

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A Report on Chinese Christmas Eve

08.04.2017 by bloggard // 2 Comments

Marin County, July 16, 2017 — For her birthday, Adrienne came down from her Oregon home to visit with her daughters and grandchildren. Her whole family was there: Layla, Celina, Jessica, Dameon, and even Rhiannon and her puppy “Penny,” who flew in from Germany. All of them remembered …

 

Marin County, December 24, 2007 –– In our house on Scenic Avenue in San Anselmo, I made up a Christmas Eve Tradition. Because the previous month at Thanksgiving, due to Layla’s insistence, we had enjoyed a wonderful dinner of Tofurky. Ha! Enjoyed? Who am I kidding?

The Tofurky Experience

We agreed unilaterally that we would NEVER have Tofurky again. Maybe it’s ok for some things, but as a substitute for a proper Thanksgiving dinner … thank you, but no. So here we are coming up on Christmass Eve, and dinner was a problem. Because Adrienne doesn’t cook; it’s against her religion. And franky I don’t know how to do a turkey, and it’s a lot of work, and so invention being the mother of necessity … I made up [Read more…]

Categories // All, amazement, family, Looking Back, magic, time

Margaret Ellen Hurn, a Birthday

07.28.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

8 Miles North of Henrietta Texas, July 28, 2017 — My mother would be one hunded years old today, born in 1917.

In this photo near the end of her life, she leans on the front fence before the farmhouse on the farm where she grew up. She (and my two brothers David and Paul) had moved back to the farm after the death of my stepfather. She’d been born Margaret Ellen Hurn, became Margaret French as my mother, and later remarried to Dr. Strickland in Henrietta.

Two Friends

Around the base of that tree on the left, you can just make out a dark metal band. Once upon a time, long before I was born, the tree was planted inside what must have been a wheel part. A metal band about a foot tall, and maybe four feet diameter. The tree grew and grew and grew, until the band was quite snug, about 20 years before Margaret Strickland was photographed here at the front fence.

In a recent photo from google earth, the tree is gone. I wonder what became [Read more…]

Categories // All, childhood, happiness, Looking Back, love, the farm, time

Dr. Detecto Rescues a Rope

07.04.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

Daly City, 1989: If you read a Dashiel Hammett book about Sam Spade, or even a modern Sue Grafton book about Kinsey Milhone, you will discover that their investigations are exciting, dangerous, and apparently pay the bills. (Though Sam Spade seemingly just throws his bills into the trash.)

When I was Dr. Detecto, the private investigator, my own investigations were neither exciting, nor dangerous, nor did they pay the bills.

As proof, I respectfully submit my most exciting, dangerous, and profitable case — the Case of the Rescued Rope …

I was musing in my Geary street office one afternoon in the early fall in San Francisco. The air had just turned crisp, and I was thinking about the gubbamint and dozing off, when a tall woman walked past the window. I knew she was tall because my office was on the second floor. [Read more…]

Categories // adventure, All, comfort zone, fantasy, Looking Back

The Country Club

06.13.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

Henrietta, Texas, 1949: If you drive north out of town, the road curves clockwise around the dam of the water reservoir, and after a sharp left turn crosses the bridge. This is the place where a car-owning teenager must determine how fast he can drive around that corner.

In my high school years, Wayne Klein’s souped-up 1955 Mercury held the record. In the movies, all teenagers have souped up hot rods, but the average teenager knows nothing about motors, and doesn’t know how to change the oil, much less how to “soup up” a car. Besides, what does soup have to do with it?

Wayne’s car was actually souped up, because his father had souped it, and it ran like a bat out of hell, so Wayne could drive that curve at 55 miles an hour. Since the posted sign says “25”, this was a wonderful accomplishment. And, unlike unfortunate Beckham Guthrie Jr., Wayne wasn’t even killed.

Now, if you chose not to take that left turn, and [Read more…]

Categories // Looking Back

Jerry Lefevre

05.20.2017 by bloggard // 10 Comments

Marine on St. Croix, Minnesota, May 18, 2017 — Jerry Lefevre was two grades older than me in High School. He bought a Chevrolet. It looked much like this picture, except that it just wouldn’t do.

Not according to Jerry.

The problem was the red panel. Jerry thought it was not cool.

He had the red panel painted white like the rest of the car. Therefore I cannot now find a picture to show the car. Perhaps it was the only one of it’s kind.

As was, in my eyes, Jerry.

Gravelly voice even as a teen, speaking in short bursts of [Read more…]

Categories // All, childhood, college, friends, Looking Back

Memorial Day for a Great Warrior

04.10.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

Mount Shasta, California, Memorial Day, May 28, 2007: My cat Percy was found in the Mendocino countryside by a short-term roommate when I lived in Mill Valley. The roommate was moving and I asked to keep the kitten.

“Sure,” said the roommate.

There we lived with Morgan, my durn ol kitty, who liked the kitten, and taught him such cat wisdom as she could. Then we moved and became trailer trash in San Rafael. Percy the kitten grew quickly into a long-legged male with yellow eyes, and a short gray coat. Together they roamed the trailer park. There Percy discovered a vile enemy. Black cat.

Black cat, and Percy had many rumbles. It was a scandal.

At the end of the day, as the sun sunk slowly over Toys ‘R Us, I’d step from the trailer and whistle loudly twice. From somewhere up the way would come wandering Morgan and Percy, tired from the day’s toil, and ready for supper.

And then we moved to San Anselmo.

Dangers of San Anselmo

We’d been invited to live with Adrienne and the dog Tulip. Morgan and Percy spent three days locked in the bathroom while Tulip went ballistic outside the door. And when Tulip became used to them living in the bathroom we introduced them all around, and as expected they became fast friends. Tulip and Percy invented a complicated and fun game which involved who could get their paws around the rungs of a chair. This game made Tulip smile.

We weren’t sure how trailer-trash cats would fare in this more upscale neighborhood, but you’d never know their origins from their behavior, as if they’d always been ritzy cats.

And then in his travels around the neighborhood, Percy discovered an evil enemy. Orange cat.

There were fabled rumbles. It was a scandal.

The Reinforcements: Tulip and Me

When the sounds of battle arose, Tulip leaped up as if electrified and ran out the door, followed swiftly by myself. There, in the distance of the driveway, the two battling cats froze, as Orange cat stared in growing horror at Tulip bearing down the driveway, and at myself on the deck.

(I waved my arms and gibbered like a wild ape and made loud growling threats, as is proper.)

Flying away into the underbrush, Orange cat beat a hasty retreat.

Percy, his tail much larger than usual, stormed grouchily into the house. We told him that he was whipping Orange cat’s butt, though sometimes that wasn’t totally clear.

The Big Yellow Truck

And so we lived, and then in time packed a household into the Big Yellow Truck, and Percy into his cat carrier, and moved to Mount Shasta. He complained all the way. Morgan had left us in San Anselmo, so she couldn’t make the ride.

Percy and Tulip enjoyed the yard, and Percy discovered that the railing and the apple tree led to the roof, and like a pirate of old, he kept a weather eye on the neighborhood.

It was not long, wandering the neighborhood, before Percy discovered a dreadful enemy. Striped cat.

There were wild rumbles. It was a scandal.

Warfare in Mount Shasta

He’s been happy in Mount Shasta. He likes the weather, except for the snow, which he blames on me, and he likes the water. He likes watching the birds. He leaps the gate to the fence, and comes and goes, and in the twilight can usually be found on the front porch steps, watching passers-by. When he’s not there, I whistle loudly twice, and then I call his special call.

This is his name with a loud gargle in the middle, and then “What you doin, boy?” These sound wacky and perplexes the neighbors no doubt. However, the sound carries, and he comes trotting from some errand in the vacant-lot woods behind George Brown’s house.

In the night, he likes to slip into my room where he snores on my chest until I fall asleep, and then, offended when I begin my own snoring, he scratches at the door so I have to awaken and let him out.

Then he goes to Adrienne’s room, and there entertains her during the night.

Nemesis

Today, he appeared to have an intestinal blockage, as he’s had before. He’s fifteen, which is latter days for a male cat. I found a vet willing to help us on this holiday, and so I bagged him up in the carrier, and assured him that he’d be right as rain soon.

But the vet had other news. Serious and bad news. It was something else. Percy was very lethargic. In my way, I asked him if he could get well. He said no.

I stayed with him while the deadly injection made its way to slow and still his breathing. Tough fellow, his heart beat on and on, growing weaker. I stroked his face the way he likes, and I told him how grateful I’ve been for his hanging out with me all these years. I reminded him of our many adventures. And finally, he was gone.

The world is a smaller place without him. Percy was his name. A great warrior. My good buddy.

Categories // adventure, All, animals, friends, Looking Back, Mount Shasta

I Gotta Espress Mysef!

03.28.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

Medford, Oregon, March 28, 2017: A friend on Facebook was wailing about expressing her feelings, and the resulting reactions from others that didn’t go well. And it took me back, to remember …

I don’t remember where or when, or what had just happened, but I recall the exact moment, so many years ago, that I had a brainstorm, and I realized that I didn’t need to share every thought I had, every view, every observation, every opinion.

I realized that everyone else around me was busy living their own lives, and that at any given moment they had their own battles (sometimes bigger than mine, and certainly bigger to them). So there were good times for me to share my views, and (lots of times) to not share my views at all.

And I felt — But I gotta express myself! — and then realized that no, actually, I didn’t gotta, and sometimes it would be self-destructive for me to do so, or damaging or hurtful to others around me, in spite of my powerful urge to do so.

Well, my life didn’t change over night, but over years, it did.

And now I sometimes share “who I am” and sometimes I don’t. Because, really, you are who you are, but what you do — talk, express yourself, remain silent, wave your arms, sit quietly — these are just behaviors.

Who you are is an eternal truth, and only evolves over time as you learn and grow. But mere behaviors? They are within your control, to select (or not) in each moment to advance your survival, and the survival of those around you.

That’s my two cents. Maybe it might be a useful viewpoint to explore.

Or maybe not.

Categories // All, brainstorming, consciousness, Looking Back, making changes, mind

The Super Secret Missile Base at College

03.28.2017 by bloggard // Leave a Comment

North Texas State University, Denton Tex 1965as, Fall: Just north of town was a super-secret Nike missile launching facility, and nobody was supposed to know about it. Here’s a picture of it —

The road at the top of the picture is “Locust Street,” or as locals called it “Missile Base Road.” Because how could you not know? I knew, and I was just an undergraduate.

You see,  an engineer was brought in because it turns out that the missile pad was actually just a tiny bit too low for proper launching so as to wipe out some foreign city far away. And this guy needed to figure out how to raise is very slightly.

He stayed at the Holiday Inn, where I worked the night shift, and that’s how I know. After all, it was a secret but he told me because I was a trusted motel employee, right?

Then, a couple of days later, he came in to check out, with a huge bag of nickels. They were left-over nickels he explained. He was real happy. Turns out that the thickness of a nickel was exactly the amount they needed to raise the floor.

So he’d gone down to the bank downtown on the square, [Read more…]

Categories // All, amazement, college, Looking Back

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